Saturday Suck: More Than a Stammer

Jimmy Stewart is one of my favorite actors. I'm not talking "favorite classic movie actor" or "probably should be on the list because he's such a well-known actor." I mean watching a Jimmy Stewart movie will rivet me to my seat. Sure, the Frank Capra films are the most famous, and they're great. I've declared that I can only watch "It's a Wonderful Life" every other year because it so thoroughly breaks me. My system can't take it more often than that.


But "Vertigo" and "Rope" and "The Philadelphia Story" and "Rear Window" and the classic Westerns still blow me away. He's seen as an Everyman, but he had a real dark side that was all the more effective BECAUSE he was such a stand-in for the audience. You identify so closely with him that when he takes these dark turns you don't have any choice but - sick at heart - to follow him down the long hallway to hell.


So could somebody please explain this?

Jimmy Stewart

The Aberdares!

The North Pole's rather chilly,
Those who've been there all will tell.
There's lots of snow and lots of ice
And lots of wind as well.


An iceberg's really never warm
And takes a while to melt.
A snowball's not the hottest thing
That I have ever felt.


Siberia is never mild,
And never very nice.
They send a lot of people there,
And put them all on ice.


But then there's a place in Africa
That puts them all to shame.
They say Jack Frost was born here,
The Aberdare's its name.


They've never known the temperature,
Thermometers just fail,
For when exposed, the mercury
Just sinks below the scale.


It never ever snows here,
The snow it wouldn't dare,
Snow and ice aren't dummies,
It's cold in Aberdare!


As I lie here gasping in my tent,
The chill just numbs my spine.
Then suddenly a vision comes
That takes me back in time.


There's California sunshine,
And I can breathe again,
A putting green - a fairway -
Relaxing in my den.


Then just as fast the vision leaves
No more sunshine, no more golf.
No need to wipe my tears away,
I simply break them off.


A frigid mist is moving in,
I've put on all my clothes.
There's not enough - the chill seeps in -
Is this the end? Who knows?


So gather your statistics,
Let all the facts be told.
Oh! Aberdare, you're beautiful,
Bu, Aberdare, you're cold.




It's not the worst poem ever written - there are some funny lines like breaking the tears off and snow being too smart to fall. But still, doing Robert Service knockoffs? I sort of wish he'd tried to write more during his heyday. The verse stylings would probably be just as mediocre but the subject matter would have been way more interesting. As an interesting side note, he won a Grammy for the audio version of the book this poem comes from, "Jimmy Stewart and His Poems."


So I've got to say, Reagan-era Stewart (or should that be Carson-era?) is kinda disappointing. Maybe that's just too much darkness for one person to shoulder. Relax, write poems about your pets and your kids and trips you've taken, be a kind, grandfatherly presence. Not a bad way to ride out your sunset years.


I just can't help wishing more of these luminaries went down swinging instead of in rocking chairs.